March 2023
I have a customer who keeps his 310 at our little skypark in the High Desert of SoCal. But the time was coming for the plane’s annual inspection so he asked me to fly the plane to his hangar at Van Nuys. Sure, no problem. Just an easy hop over the low mountains to the south of me…
Tuesday the weather was perfect, sunny and no wind. I walked over to the tie-down area, unclipped the chains and looked it over. Man, this thing looked terrible. The underside and landing gear was covered in an oily grime. Tires look suspiciously over-inflated. One strut was completely collapsed; the other was almost there. I didn’t bother to check the oil because the owner had flown it just a week before. He said it might need gas…
I climb inside, check switches and crank engines. The left engine announces that it doesn’t want to play today. The right engine starts with great difficulty. Ok, flip the generator on and get the battery charged for the attempt on the other engine. Nope, no change in the buss voltage. The voltmeter is stuck on 22 volts. Well shit… that’s not even a charged battery. I flog the left engine until it finally grumbles to life. Flip the generator switch… 26 volts. Well, that’s an improvement. Maybe it will work properly once I get some revs on the engine. Both engines have oil pressure…
I roll it over to the fuel pit and put some gas in it. Discovered one engine has a hot mag. Another note on my squawk list. I decided to roll it up and down the taxiway, just to warm up the engines and to let me get a feel for the plane. Surprisingly, the brakes work well which is a good thing because the steering is terrible. Probably the typical frozen nose strut bearings. Another note on my squawk list. Steering with throttles, I get the plane onto the taxiway and roll it up and down a few times… just a fast walking speed. Holy crap, this thing is a dog. Half the gauges don’t work, it doesn’t steer, there is a huge split in the throttles, and more. I get the feeling that this is just a tired and neglected, beat-up old dog of a 310. Well, I’ve flown sketchier planes before so let’s get on with it…
I taxied over to the hangar in back of my house and shut down. I let some air out of the tires and get some nitrogen into the struts. Check the oil. The right engine takes 4 quarts just to get it up to the 7-quart mark. The oil in the left engine is black as tar. Shake my head… I’m gonna die…
Take-off was uneventful and the almost-empty 310 climbed like the proverbial homesick angel. I need some altitude to get over the mountains so I level off at 8500 feet. The voltmeter never gets above 26 volts. Passing over Fox Field, I call tower and get a radio check. Loud and clear, they say. Hmmm, well that’s good.
In minutes I’m over the mountains and I can see Van Nuys airport about 10 miles, straight ahead. Crap, I’m way too high. I pull the throttles and props back to lose altitude. I start down. I’m still too high so Tower clears me for a right 360 turn. Ok, that’s better. Now I’m about 4 miles out, lined up for a straight-in and altitude is good. The VASI is showing 2 white, 2 red. I push the prop levers forward to prepare for landing…
And the left prop feathers and kills the engine. Say what? Sigh… I’m getting too old for this…
The prop lever is already full forward so I hit the starter button, Remember… weak battery. The engine turns over with agonizing slowness. Eventually the blades turn enough to catch some wind and the engine start spinning. It finally catches and I’m back to having two engines. Ok, gear down, flaps down…
The landing and rollout was uneventful. I clear the runway and taxi to the owner’s hangar. He is standing on the taxiway, waving me into the parking spot. I shut down the engines and note the time. I open the door and climb out. “How was the flight?”
Yeah, we need to talk…
And that’s the news from Flying Dog Ranch.